HOW DO YOU STAY POSITIVE LORRAINE?

POSITIVETY & ME?

My love of Outdoors is in my blood, but a coping strategy  not just for me?

My love of Outdoors is in my blood, but a coping strategy not just for me?

Firstly, it has taken me almost three weeks to actually get this Post out to you, it has been on my mind to do and as I write very much from my kidney and words knocking around in my head always. Now I am sat in IKEA following another NHS meeting I have been to for better outcomes for patients and it feels right time to talk positive, as felt my voice was heard and RENAL was brought into the equation where it was needed and embraced.

Having a VOICE and being a Patient given to not saying NO as much as I could in the virtual world has demanded of my voluntary time I give, hence my BLOG passion has been put on hold. I could write a BLOG everyday, but depending on feedback maybe this will happen. I never know or plan.

I get asked on a regular basis by patients I have connected with on Facebook Groups, Twitter, Charities, Hospital, Clinics, Morrisons?? who I have inspired or who have found me….

How do you stay so positive Lorraine or Purple Chick?

MAGIC POTION??

Invite Colour into your Life

Invite Colour into your Life

I am ME, a patient YES, but Iv been on this earth some time now and lived some adventure and fingers crossed it will continue.

I cannot really own up to having a ‘how to do list’ to how I actually have had this attitude to life and resonate this to others and it is not something I actually have to work or have worked at or practice.

I am no clinician, no expert on psychology, yes a proud Mum, ex Manager {jan ’14} and lots of interests, so other than being approached by anyone that needs support or guidance, I am guided to these people in my life or I have sought as part of my giving something back to others and I am a chatty, natural connector & love meeting people. Plus it’s just not in ME to be negative, as corny as it sounds, its very much what I have always been like, laugh lots, been called entertaining…always makes me smile if I can turn someone’s day round and found from a young age, that now I can say, it is me and comes from WITHIN.

Believe in You

Believe in You

FROM WITHIN/INNER STRENGTH

I believe our ROOTS are very much a source of who we are and sooooo PROUD of mine. Being the eldest of a family of 6 in a vibrant village community on a lovely, lively council estate in the 60’s, well this sociable KID just learned how to survive from losing her dad and had to become a team leader and motivator back then too for 3 sisters and 2 brothers.

I can now say I am PROUD that the younger ME was a caring, kind, driven, passionate, embracing 11 year old, who just got bigger and wiser, having absorbed 11 years of the support and love from her community champion Dad to inspire her in those early days!

Plus a crazy family on both parent’s side, who nurtured us all, personally my Nana on my mums side was my angel and she believed in ME, knew what I was up against with my treasured school work I loved and listened and helped me to do what I was doing for my siblings whilst my Mum had to go out to work.

Crazy then, Crazy now

Crazy then, Crazy now

CRAZY MUM

Having been over this past 29 years very much a positive Mum to 3 and now onto being a Nana too, enduring a psychological journey these last few years with my POLYCYSTIC Kidney Disease, Fistula Access, Transplant, Hernia,  this positivety has been tested many times and still is.

However, I adopted the attitude without recognising, that this barrier I had…well nothing seemed to ever hurt as much as losing my DAD, this was proven, as I had such inner strength and my Dad was in my heart always,always! At desperate times, I talked to him and remember saying…come on Dad..xx

For me to have survived my journey, as many patients with chronic disease do everyday, I was seen as a very complicated patient to my surgeons, who were baffled by what happened in my first operation.

The drive within was so strong, I just kept coming back from near death 3 times in 6 weeks. I forget that some time.

BUT HOW GOOD DO I FEEL SAYING THAT NOW??

image

One Happy Chick Embracing Life

ARE YOU A POSITIVELY DRIVEN PERSON, HOW ARE YOU PERCEIVED?

All the above, aside from being positive and driven, I have struggled at times with being this totally, as I believed, like many patients, I could cope?

Reality was for ME, in end stage renal failure, I am human, I was far from fine and it needed a renal psychologist offered to me to make me see that.

YES..my attitude from my Renal Psychologist was…..’you are doing great Lorraine’ but you need to reach out to those around you, instead of you being the one looking after them!!!

That for ME was the toughest challenge, being an Independant, Strong, Hard Working woman and Mum, being told to open up more to my children and friends, plus take or ask for help. But I did, it took me time, emotional ride, out of my comfort zone, but I embraced and accepted these positive words and my life changed from not feeling alone totally to feeling less vulnerable.

Embrace Life

Believe in YOU

SUMMARY OF MY COPING STRATEGIES & POSITIVETY

*Accept changes
*Adapt to changes
*Move forward
*Try not to dwell
*Low days are normal
*Do not be too hard on you
*Focus on the moment
*Do not think too far ahead about what may not happen
*Have goals, dreams, but set your sights lower, then anything above & beyond is a bonus
*Accept help
*Lose pride and ask for HELP
*Surround yourself with positivety and negativety being directed your way, try to ignore or step back from
*Put you first, as selfish as it is, it is about you if you are trying to survive with a positive attitude
*If psychologist or social workers are not offered to you, then ask for! The service is there for many, but inconsistency across the country I hope to challenge more and more on my mission. I felt lucky, was lucky and listening ear from non family or friend is important on any long term illness pathway.

Do you practice these or find of help on your journey?

Life is full of Paths

Life is full of Paths

BOOTS ON

The above are my thoughts and an idea of where I feel my positivety comes from, my way , if you even try to do something positive everyday, however, small it is, in time you will like this empowerment. This will grow, never give up, we are all unique, different bodies, minds, complications, backgrounds, bigger pictures. It also takes a lot of energy and tears for many who are more  vulnerable or their  bigger picture dictates much more outside support to help achieve even the smallest achievement. Be respectful of yourself and ask others to accept this about you.

Never Give up Hope

Never Give up Hope

DO NOT CHANGE YOU FOR OTHERS

I need to end this by saying for me personally, I am not willing to change for anyone with my approach to life, but for me POSITIVETY has got me through my whole life and others I have met, who ooze this.

However, it also attracts negativety, jealousy, selfishness, envy, backing off, threat to some. BUT I see that as their issue and not mine. I am ME. It can be lonely sometimes, but only if you allow it. I don’t allow it. Journeys make us strong warriors and my BOOTS ON & VOICE keeping at it.

Be Proud always

Be Proud always

Please feel free to give me feedback, I hope I have made sense, inspired and touched anyone, who has endured similiar experiences and how it has affected your life.

Be happy with you, keep at it.

From my Kidney

PC xx

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